The Lebanese Blind Date

So, in most of the developed world a blind date will occur after one person or a couple "thinks" that so-and-so and so-and-so should meet. Sometimes the blind dates occurs without either party suspecting the arrangement and other times the parties are given the contact detail and they arrange a date to meet one another. In either instance, the function of the blind date is for the 2 people to simply meet. Maybe a new friendship will result or maybe a romantic relationship will develop. Marriage is not the goal of a traditional blind date.

Well, in the developing world, all the traditional rules are thrown out the window. Entire families are involved in the process of finding a suitable match and gods are prayed to with the sole purpose of marriage.

As a single woman of child bearing and marriage age my family here in Lebanon is focused on arranging a marriage for me. A very thoughtful gesture, but I am left wondering why they don't focus their efforts on any of my cousins who have yet to marry ....I mean, I do have one marriage under my belt already.

Upon arriving to my aunts' house here in Beirut she began praying around me as I would get ready for school in the morning. So I applied my makeup and she applied the power of the prayer....lighting candles, holding prayer cards and saint statues over me and all the while uttering "may you find a good husband". Every outing that put us near a church would result in her crossing herself and uttering the same words.

Perhaps I was a bit naive thinking the family would just pray hard and let things work out by themselves. How wrong I was.

As I spent Thursday afternoon relaxing at the Riveria beach club I received a call from my father's cousin. She heard I was in town and wanted to see if I would be heading up north for the weekend. When I confirmed my plans to be in the village, she then arranged for us to meet on Friday for ice cream and said she'd even invite along one of my aunts that she also wanted to see. I returned from the beach club and packed my suitcase for Friday, knowing I would be leaving directly after classes and I would have little time to pack on Friday.

As I was zipping up my weekend case on Friday my aunt came into the room and asked if I had packed a dress. A bit of a strange question, but I shrugged it off as her wanting to make sure I had the wardrobe to suit the ever changing plans that are common place here in Lebanon.

Along the way to the north I picked up my grandmother. When I was dropped off at another aunt's house (ps, i have 4 of them here in Lebanon) my grandmother leaned in for a goodbye kiss and said "be sure to change your clothes before you go get ice cream". Well of course I would, I certainly wouldn't be wearing my bathing suit and I planned to spend the afternoon by the pool.

When it arrived time to head in from the pool and get ready, my aunt said I should be sure to wear a dress in case I met anyone nice. Ok....that's when it hit me....I was being set up. I took a quick shower, threw on one those amazing maxi summer dresses that we all love with a pair of sandals and made for the door. Only to be stopped by my aunt who told me I should put on high heels. Well, while I was game to go along with their plan for the set up, there was no way I was putting on high heels to go to the local ice cream parlor. Whoever I was going to met would have to take me for as I am....a sensibly minded woman who would NOT wear heels to go out for ice cream.

On the ride to the ice cream parlor, my other aunt asked if I knew the story of how she met her husband. Not having heard the story my aunt went onto describe how her mother had arranged for someone to come to the house to meet her....and yup, they hit it off and got married not too shortly after.

By the time I arrived to the ice cream parlor it dawned on me that my grandmother, each aunt, my second cousin and more were all involved in this elaborate plan. A co-worker of my second cousin just happened to stop by and meet us all for ice cream. At which point my cousin and my aunt put on the interviewing skills that would put trained journalists to shame. Shortly after, they both had to step out to check on something at another store....and I found myself alone with this guy. When they returned, claiming fatigue, they asked if he'd be able to take me home later.....since we seemed to be enjoying our discussion.

Abandoned by the master minds, we left the ice cream shops and met some of his friends at another restaurant. His friends seemed nice and we were having an interesting conversation. At one point his friend asked me where I was from in Lebanon. When I mentioned my village, his eyebrows peaked. Then when I mentioned my name, he choked on his drink and said "guess what, we are second cousin's". Only in Lebanon would this happen. My family is huge and there are numerous second and third cousins that I have never met.

Since Friday, every request for plans and outings has left me wondering....am I in store for another set up? It certainly is within the realm of possibility given the effort and scheming that went into Friday evening.

Love, Nadia